Blues maneuvering out of this

Summer dawns with coffee and beers
and cigarettes
with Billie Holiday
and
yet
sometimes
some whisky

slugs crawling all over my arms
and body
Those jazz players
sitting on a corner
looking at me
and I drunk more whisky
because I couldn't bare their look
their eyes
their words
yet sometimes
I kneel in nights
and it should have been in america
in New York
in Mexico
it should have been anyplace where except here

and they sing about strange fruits
about blues
those things I can support well
I keep remembering strange movies
divisions running away with me
and this theory
that everything will somehow
get along
get together
and make sense
those delirious objects
inside of me
actually being pushed

and I keep singing  along with them
also along with this critter
who reminds me of me
and the critter
is so horny
I can't bear it
and he blinks at me
saying words I would never understood
unless drunk
like now
and he keeps talking
and keep drinking

and both of us
want chaos
we need chaos
we enjoy it